One day our "pride parades" may no longer be necessary as we blend more and more into the "norm" with equal rights. Living the heterosexual lifestyle with marriage, kids, and the suburbs – oh my! Our clubs, the underground nature of our lifestyle, and the thrill secrecy and living in shadows provides will all vanish. What unity will we have within our community if we no longer have the exclusivity?
A local gay pride organization was flattered that their rainbow flag was in the back of parade celebrating Martin Luther King, Jr. and his civil rights efforts. I said, "What are we taking a backseat now?" – Half joking of course.
"Not at all. This was a march honoring Dr. King. It was important for our community to show respect to those who fought discrimination. This march was not about our fight but to give thanks and to honor the civil rights movement and its leaders." – Was their response.
Interesting choice of words. "The civil rights movement" is our own. Racism still exists, but civil rights -- we are the only US born citizens being deprived of them. Honor is one thing; celebration when atrocities still occur is odd. MLK's speech and dreams about "all men being created equal" may indicate that we should be fighting the fight. Drawing comparisons between our current struggle and the civil rights movement of then – well isn't such an event the perfect stage? There is much more to accomplish. How can we celebrate as if discrimination is over? And why should we commend the civil rights victories of groups who often oppose us?
We have accepted little "acceptance" and our too easily flattered by minimal tolerance. It often feels as if even our most powerful allies and advocates are willing to say "Thank you for not spitting in my face for being different than you".
Lt. Dan Choi, Iraq combat veteran and Arabic linguist, was discharged under DADT. He had the following to say to Newsweek after he was arrested at the White House gates and spent the night in jail for a protest.
"Within the gay community so many leaders want acceptance from polite society. I think there's been a betrayal of what is down inside of us in order to achieve what looks popular, what looks enviable. The movement seems to be centered around how to become an elite. There is a deep schism [in the gay-rights movement], everyone knows this. But this shouldn't be about which group has better branding. There is a tremor right now in every gay and transgender youth that these groups are not grasping. I would say to them—you do not represent us if all you are looking for is a ladder in to elite society. Ghandi did not need three-course dinners and a cocktail party to get his message out."
"When I heard Kathy Griffin was going to be a spokeswoman for Don't Ask, Don't Tell, I wondered about that. I have great respect for her as an advocate. But if [the Human Rights Campaign] thinks that having a rally at Freedom Plaza with a comedian is the right approach, I have to wonder. Don't Ask, Don't Tell is not a joking matter to me. To be at Freedom Plaza and not at the White House or Congress? Who are they trying to influence? I felt like they were just trying to speak to themselves. If that's the best the lobbying groups and HRC can do, then I don't know how these powerful groups are supposed to represent our community. Kathy Griffin and [HRC president] Jay Solmonese said they would march with me to the White House but didn’t. I feel so betrayed by them."
Furthermore, are we conceding to an acceptance of how we can be more like heterosexuals? We are not really demanding acceptance of who we are but rather how we can be like them.
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